Noel Gallagher's funniest and most outrageous quotes

3 June 2023, 14:00

King of rock and master of the one-liner Noel Gallagher has given us decades of newsworthy gold. Here's a collection of some of his finest moments...

By Radio X

@RadioX

1. Noel Gallagher on playing Oasis songs...

   "They're my songs and I wrote them all by myself and I'm proud of them and I'm proud of what they mean to other people and I'm proud of where they sit with what I've done now."(to DIY, July 2011)

   

2. Noel Gallagher on the legacy of Oasis...

   "Gone are the days when bands like The Smiths and The Jam would always be in the top ten. Oasis are probably the last of the big – and I use this term because I can’t think of another – ‘alternative’ bands to really make an impact on the country." (to Dotmusic, July 2002)

   

3. Noel Gallagher on his brother Liam...

   "Liam is... rude, arrogant, intimidating and lazy. He's the angriest man you'll ever meet. He's like a man with a fork in a world of soup." (to Q magazine, April 2009)

   

4. Noel Gallagher on the Meaning of Life

   "Some people live their life...they worry about the destination. They worry about where they're going. I enjoy the trip. Wherever you're going is where you'll end up. Don't worry about that. Enjoy the scenery on the way."

   

5. Noel Gallagher on fame...

   "Nothing bothers me more than when groups like Pearl Jam and Nirvana whine and moan and complain about life and being famous. Let me tell you, being famous is great! If you hate your job so much, why don't you f**king go work at a car wash or McDonald's or something?" (to the BBC, April 2008)

   

6. Noel Gallagher on drugs...

   "I really think that the legalization of drugs — taking a long-term view of it — over 25 years probably would be a great thing because it would take the romance and the rebel element out of it for kids. But that 25-year [period] would be f**king utter chaos and disaster and scandal after f**king drug-addled scandal." (to Rolling Stone, May 2015)

   

7. Noel Gallagher on hip hop stars at Glastonbury...

   "Glastonbury has a tradition of guitar music and even when they throw the odd curve ball in on a Sunday night you go 'Kylie Minogue?' I don't know about it. But I'm not having hip hop at Glastonbury. It's wrong." (to Female First, June 2005)

   

8. Noel Gallagher on the 90s...

   "The 90s was not the beginning of something - it was the end of something. It was the end of the music business as we knew it. We were the last rock stars." (to Radio X, September 2012)

   

9. Noel Gallagher on what he'd say to God...

   "I'd say, "You've heard Don't Look Back In Anger?", and he'd say, "Of course". I'd say, 'Look it's me, let us in. I can play you a tune. I robbed some stuff, I took a lot of drugs, but I'm all right'." (to The Sun, January 2013)

   

10. On Liam's solo career

    “It’s made him pull his finger out and work for a living at last. He’s selling more records and way more tickets than me so good luck to him, ride it until the wheels come off.” (to The Big Issue, November 2019)

    

11. On the Liam Gallaher-penned track Songbird

    "I thought Songbird by Liam was great. We did a demo of it and it was more like Love Me Do by The Beatles, It's got a mouth organ on it and it sounds like The Beatles. Then we took all the instruments off it and it became this acoustic thing that I think is perfect." (to Matt Morgan, January 2021)

    

12. On doing interviews:

    “Interviews are an occupational hazard. You’re sat in a room with some guy from Stockholm who you’ve never met and he’s asking you about your mum. It’s f**king preposterous. Because the honest answer to that is: ‘What’s it got to do with you?’ But the smart answer is always: ‘I liked her until she gave birth to Liam.’” (to The Guardian, August 2019)

    

13. On the prospect of an Oasis reunion

    "I can’t envisage the morning I wake up and think I’d like to spend two years on the road, arguing all around the world with Liam." (to The Big Issue, November 2019)

    

14. On people paying for music

    “Since the rise of the coffee shop, culture has disappeared, don't you think? People are horrified that they have to pay for music. Music! But $20 for two coffees, oh, absolutely." (to NPR, March 2018)

    

15. On the "parka monkeys"

    “There’s a load of geezers dressed in parkas who want you to carry on doing what it is they’ve kind of missed out on. When I’m in the studio, I don’t give a f**k what they want." (to Discogs, April 2018)